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Writer's pictureStephen Burckhardt

Friday Funnies: Teachers!



Hello Posse!


With school getting back in session in many places, I thought now would be a good time for some jokes for teachers! Lord knows with all the stress of this coming year they will need a good laugh or two or two thousand! Whether you are teaching in person, online or both, I think you will like these classroom friendly jokes.


So, without all the usual dilly-dallying . . . here are the jokes.


Enjoy!

Stephen

 

Student: Is it okay to use a double negative?

Teacher: They are a big NO-NO.

 

Teacher: “Johnny, can you name two pronouns?” Student: “Who, me?”

 

Teacher: What’s the difference between a cat and a comma? Student: One has claws at the end of its paws. The other is a pause at the end of a clause.

 

Teacher: There’s a fine line between a numerator and a denominator.

Unfortunately, only a fraction of you will remember this.

 

Q: Why are teenagers always in groups of three?

A: Because they can’t even.

 

Q: What kind of snake is 3.14159 meters long?

A: A pi-thon.

 

A photon walks into a hotel and the bellman asks if he needs any help with his luggage.

The photon responds: “No thanks, I’m traveling light.”

 

I heard a rumor that Oxygen and Magnesium were dating.

I was like “OMg”

 

Q: Why are there barcodes on all the ships in Sweden?

A: So they can Scan-di-navy-in.

 

I always wondered what pencil Shakespeare wrote with? Was it 2B or not 2B?

 

Q: Who’s the King of every classroom?

A: The ruler.

 

I’m close friends with 25 letters of the alphabet … I don’t know Y.

 

Last but not least . . .


Last night my classroom was broken into and all of the dictionaries were stolen.

I’m at a loss for words.

 

For all my teacher friends dealing with online learning, this great video will really hit home. Be sure to subscribe to Bored Teachers on YouTube.


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