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Writer's pictureStephen Burckhardt

Friday Funnies: And So It Begins!



Hello Posse!


Today's blog is going to be a bit short. I am starting work on part five, Into the West: ????. I know you are probably wondering what I will be calling it, so am I. I have a few ideas I am working on but nothing seems to be just what I want so I am still working on it. Big things are happening in Sharon Springs. Bandits strike again, lawmen swarm the territory, lost children are save by unlikely heroes, an precious lives are lost. There will be revelations that no one could see coming. Subscribe to my newsletter to to keep up on the latest Into the West Saga Serial information!


But enough about that for now. Time for the jokes! Since I am getting to work on the next book, I thought a few jokes about authors and books would be appropriate.


Enjoy,

Stephen


 

My nephew once told me he wanted to grow up to become a great writer.


When I asked him what "Great" meant to him, he said, "I want to write something the whole world will read, something people will react to on a deeply emotional level, something that will make people cry, scream, cry, even yell out in anger!" 


He has since gown up and achieved his dream. He works for Microsoft, writing error messages. 

 

An author went to the hospital and yelled out, "couldn't, wouldn't, don't, won't!"

A nearby doctor told the nurse, "Quick get this woman to the deliver room she's in labor"

As the women was being wheeled away an shocked intern turned to the doctor and asked, "How did you know that woman was in labor without even examining her?"

The doctor looked surprised then answered, "Weren't you listening, she had contractions!"

 

Q: Recently a man asked me what it's like to be a writer and a scammer.

A: I just smiled and said, "It has it's Prose and Cons."

 

Q: Why are escaped convicts horrible writers?

A: Because they never finish their sentences.

 

Q: Where do all the unsuccessful writers live?

A: On the writers' block.

 

Q: Did you know Stephen King has a son named Joe?

A: I’m not Joe-king, but he is . . .

 

Q: What is it like to be a struggling writer?

A: It's rather difficult to put into words.

 

Q: A man asked the musician, "Why do you only write songs about sewing machines?"

A: The young man looked incredulous, "Because I'm a Singer song writer!"

 

And last but not least . . .


An author walks into his usual bar and the bartender asks how his latest book is coming along.

"I decided to kill off some characters in my book."

The bartender is shocked and replies, "It should definitely spice up your autobiography."

 

The first standup I ever remember seeing Jim Carey perform, he did Wounded Swan Lake. I will never forget that or how rubber his face really is. Check out these impressions. Amazing!

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